More about me

I guess if you've been reading my blogs and don't really know much about me (besides everything that I eat!), then I understand why I may just seem like some weirdo posting all the crap I eat and not really understanding the why behind it!

I'm 32. I work a full-time 3rd shift job on a 2-week rotating schedule (12-hour shifts 7p-7a: Work 2, off 2, Work 2.5, Off 2, Work 2.5, off 2, repeat).  I also teach Les Mills group fitness classes at 4 different gyms 4-5 days a week. I teach BodyCombat, BodyPump, BodyAttack, and CXWorx (see www.lesmills.com for more info). On top of the time spent teaching, I also put a lot of unpaid hours in learning chorey and practicing, but it's worth it. They are amazing classes, and the members ROCK! I've also made some freakin-awesome friends thru these classes (not to mention my 'better-half'!). Since I've taken this job, I am not teaching/taking as many classes as I used to, so I also try to get some HIIT intervals and heavy lifting in at home a couple times a week.

I am also a mom of an emotionally-challenged 9-year old boy. Doc appointments, therapy appointments, etc, hence the third shift job. I also have my own issues with iron-deficiency, so I have my own appointments for doctor & infusions. It just makes it easier to have those couple days off during the week to be able to schedule appointments without having to miss work. Third shift also make for great choreography-study time!

So I'm crazy busy, but consistently busy, so I can be organized and schedulistic still. But I am not complaining though, by any means. There are people out there a lot busier and dealing with a lot worse. Plus I have an amazing man who is awesome with taking care of the cooking, kids (together we have three kids), cleaning, laundry, vehicles, all the outdoor stuff too...he really is amazing! We are happy and healthy and we make it work! I just have to be very organized with my time!

I am in good shape, and I get lots of comments all the time from people about how great I look etc, and people are usually surprised to find out that I once weighed 208 lbs (pregnant), and lost 80 pounds after having my son.  I think a lot of people think (because they've told me) that I'm one of those people who can eat whatever I want, OR that I eat perfectly.  I am neither of those people.  I struggle tremendously when it comes to food. 

I am a self-professed junk-food addict and an overeater in general. I eat fast, and I eat a LOT. I don't have concrete-specific goals, but in a perfect world, my goal would be to get to close to 15-16% body fat, which would put me around 140. (Currently 151 and 19%).  It's not about numbers though, so I consider it an 'ideal' goal, but if you have read previous posts of mine, you obviously know it's not a hugh priority for me right now of making that "goal" happen. I know enough to know that to get to my "perfect body", I would have to give up a lot of things that I love, and I'm just not willing to do that, completely, yet. 

Honestly right now I'm trying to at least maintain, ideally create a weekly deficit and move down the scale rather than up, but right now I'm in this cycle where I always navigate back to 150. When I crack down on my eating and cut the crap (junk food, desserts, fast foot, white carbs especially), I drop pounds, then life happens and back I go. 

I love food. I love drinking and hanging out with frinds. I love sharing a dessert with my little boy (although we end up fighting and probably looks like sword fighting with our spoons!). I just need to get out of the habit of eating all that as often as I do. And the embarrassment, or whatever you wanna call it (I'm not really embarrassed, I own my faults), of being completely transparent makes it easier for me to stick to eating healthier (I don't like the work Diet). I know people look up to me for fitness and nutrition and advise, so I don't want to pretend like I'm a big health-nut, always "eating clean", and then someone see me eating Cinnamon Melts dripping icing on my shirt while driving down the road!
I do know my faults. I know what to do. And what not to do. I know how to lose weight. I know what works for ME. The problem isn't a lack of knowledge about fitness and nutrition. My biggest problem is my head.  Maybe one day I'll overcome my obstacles and have my idea of my own "perfect body".  Maybe I'll continue this never-ending cycle...doubt it. Maybe I'll just say screw it, I like myself no matter how I look...doubt it. Maybe I'll balloon to 400 pounds...um, no. Either way, for right now, it is a daily battle that I will continue to fight. Even if no one is reading about it.

That's me in a nutshell :)